Dear Diary...

Well, dear friends, you may never actually see this post. But in case you do, I hope you don't mind serving as my journal/therapist. If you do...stop here. If not, read on and please tell me that I'm normal and that things will eventually get back to normal.

So we have just returned from the annual Willard Family Reunion in Bear Lake. We had a great time...the weather was hot, I sunburned my nose so that it looks like the landscape of the sun, my dogs loved the water, we played horse-shoes and bacci...it was great. And then...it was awful.

Now, I have been married for two years, and been with Gordon for six years now. We could both be described as...uh, passionate....maybe a little stubborn...certainly vocal. For all of our flaws, and there are many of those, we are totally wrapped up with one another and live for each other.

But on Sunday night, I don't really think we sounded like we loved each other very much. As a culmination of many things, Gordon and I proceded to have one of the biggest fights of our married life. In front of everyone. It was nothing to be proud of, I'll tell you that. It involved a lot of yelling, irrational behavior, and the throwing of one waterbottle at one individual's head (you might take a wild guess at the launcher and the receiver were in this scenario.) And a lot of words that no one really meant. I was, and am, absolutely horrified and mortified, all at the same time. I was also white-hot furious. Friends, this was the kind of fight that you would never want anyone to know actually happens. Most people with any sense would save these kinds of exchanges for moments of privacy...well not us. At least not that day.

So the dust is settling, but what remains is a lot of embarrassment, a good share of anger, and a lot of relationship repairs....not just our relationship, but other ones as well. It's one of those things that leave you feeling a little dark and ugly inside. And pretty sad, as well. On the other hand, it's also an experience that makes us love a little better and build relationships a little bit stronger. It also helps us to know each other and understand our weak spots.

So anyway. In case you hadn't gotten the memo...neither of us are perfect and we certainly don't have a perfect relationship. But we have plenty of love to fill in the cracks, which is really all you can ask for, I guess.